Are you taking the piss?


After a freezing cloudless night in Forbes, the heavy dew was still settling as I broke camp. While I was methodically going about packing my tent and belongings , a truck driver who had been staying in one of the cabins wandered over for a look see and a bit of a chat.

26052014 (1)“I rode a bike once until I fell off ”  he said

“It happens ” I replied

“So where you from and where ya going?

“I’m from Melbourne and heading North”

“I could do something like that too you know, only trouble is my Father was over protective. Made me kind of scared of life, but I’m not naturally a timid man.”

As pleasant as this early morning encounter session was, that dew was settling on me now. I was cold and wet and needed to head off just to warm up. I made busy hoping my man would take the hint.

“So you sound like a level headed bloke, can I ask you something?” The compliment before the question should have been a giveaway.

“Sure” I tried to act interested.

“I have this friend right…” another bad sign, “anyway another friend of ours just discovered he keeps his own piss in bottles. Had 109 of them, is that normal?”

26052014 (2)At this point I knew we were talking about him and I’m pretty sure he knew I knew  we were talking about him.

“Who’s to say, sounds like your friend’s just working through some issues, people do worse ” he lightened up at my reply. He said it had been great to chat with me, reached out and shook my hand then left. After a surgical inspired scrub of the offending hand I was off too.

It was mostly uphill from Forbes to Parkes which makes sense if your looking to chose between the two as to where to place your massive radio telescope. Lots of loose gravel and no verge in places and more roadworks called for increased effort and concentration.

26052014 (3)

Arriving at the Parkes Information Center I took in the Evils Exhibition. Parkes has it’s own annual Elvis Festival every year and they hold the world’s record for the most number of Elvis’, or is that Elvi in the one place at the one time. I purchased a postcard to send to my Mother and of course I said to the shop assistant in “Thank you, Thank you very much ”

The actual dish is around 30 km out of town in the direction that I’m headed tomorrow so rather than ride out and back and out again tomorrow, I took a half day off to service the bike and explore the town.

  In the Alexander cafe in Parkes I overheard a guy saying to his doe eyed admirer “Levitation is easy, it’s just like breathing in your head.” Glad we got that one cleared up.

Categories: Mebourne to Mackay 2,500 kilometers 2014, Solo unsupported Australia toursTags: , , , , , , , , , ,

8 comments

  1. Maybe he’s selling it ‘clean’ to cyclists!!!!!!

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  2. Haha. Got to love the wackos you meet in caravan pks. Always the diplomat nick. Did you stop in at the telescope? Keep up the entertaining posts and enjoy 🙂

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  3. Nick,ive been drinking my bottles.the bloke who gave it to me said it was home brew[sort of strange tasting but i’m perservering]
    we are due to leave in the caravan on saturday and hope to catch up soon.the new hi-light in our lives is reading your blog each morning ,keep it up,I can see a best seller coming up.

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  4. I want to see his collection of bottles before I believe that one. But, then again I did once work in a homeless mens shelter where there was an object called the Donny W…s Memorial Piss Bucket, so I guess anything is possible.

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  5. Anything under 95 bottles of piss is considered to be quite normal. I myself are up to 56. But 109 – a complete wacko. Good of you Nikolai to have a “Suspicious Mind” … Keep the great stories coming. And the average one’s ….

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  6. I am loving reading all these stories Nick, keep it up and stay safe and dry.

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